Donald Trump fired Attorney General Sally Yates for defying his Muslim travel ban. Wow. Trump’s ideas are so bad, he even caused a lawyer to do the right thing.
Monthly Archives: January 2017
She Floored Me
When I was 5 months old my mother accidentally dropped me on my head. But ever since then it’s always been on purpose.
Brilliant Disguise
A Bruce Springsteen cover band is scheduled to perform at Trump’s inauguration. That’s two acts in one day pretending to be the boss.
Job Hunters
Donald Jr. And Eric Trump will be busy running their father’s business while he is president. It’s a radical change to their usual schedule, which involves flying to Zimbabwe and murdering animals for fun.
The Price of Love
The cost of raising a child has been calculated at roughly $233,000. Just to put that in perspective, you can get 233 vasectomies for that kind of money.
In the Tank
Today SeaWorld San Diego is ending its long-running killer whale show after years of public outcry. It will be replaced with a new exhibit showcasing porpoises with non-violent criminal records.
Bosom Baddies
A California man serving a life sentence for murder has received sex re-assignment surgery and will be transferred to a women’s prison. Tom Hanks is already looking at a preliminary script.
Who Asked You
The problem with social media is that everyone thinks their opinion matters and needs to be heard. Well that’s my 2 cents.
Full Plate
Today US intelligence leaders will present Donald Trump with evidence that the Russians hacked our election. Does Trump really have time for this? He’s right in the middle of trying to sue a celebrity chef.
Low on Fluids
In Dormont, PA, a woman gave birth at a car dealership while waiting to get an oil change. The mother and child are both doing fine and will head home once they finish the tire rotation.